15 Weirdest Things About South Korea (to an American)

First of all, I should say that I fully recognize that there's something inherently a little bit racist, or at least ethnocentrist, about saying that something is 'weird' about a culture. The word 'weird' has so many negative connotations, but my intentions are not to use it in that way. I'm using the word basically as shorthand for "different from the way that my own culture does things but not necessarily better or worse." But when I tried that in the title, it didn't have quite the same ring to it.

1. SPAM gift sets

Koreans love not only eating SPAM, but giving it as a gift set as well. Every grocery store in Korea has at least half of an aisle dedicated solely to SPAM. Going to a dinner party? Forget the bottle of wine and pick up a nice SPAM gift set, complete with a handy carrying case.


2. Surgical masks EVERYWHERE

This is usually portrayed in the US media as a bunch of hypochondriacs freaking out about the latest Chinese Bird-Monkey-Walrus flu but, in reality, there are a number of reasons why people wear them. EVERYONE should wear one if they have a cold, some people wear them because of pollution in population centers, and some women wear them, combined with a hat, to maintain a lighter face complexion.


3. Couples wearing matching outfits

Or, if you want to be a little more discreet about it, matching underwear.

4. Korean age is different

Koreans measure age by how many distinct years in which you have been alive. So when you're born, you're already one and then on the following January 1st, you turn two and so on. It's kind of like high school graduating classes; you're basically telling people "I was part of the birth class of '87." This is the cause of some of the confusion surrounding Kim Jong-un's age. And yes I'm mentioning his name just so that I can share this picture.

5. Speaking of age, Korean society revolves around it

Inevitably, the second question that a new person will be asked, following "what's your name?", is "how old are you?" This is because so much of Korean society is based on whether a person is your senior or junior: the way they speak to you, how low they bow to you, and which tasks you will be expected to do. If you're the youngest person at the dinner table, you're expected to do all of the menial tasks: passing out the plates, chopping up the salad and serving it, refilling water glasses, etc. If you're the youngest person in the office, guess whose turn it ALWAYS is to take out the trash. Better find an office, and social circle, with some people younger than you.


6. Everyone uses Internet Explorer

Okay, not everyone; the exact number is 92%. I find this really strange for a country as technologically advanced as Korea. When I downloaded Chrome on my work computer, my coworkers thought it was weird that I would want to use something other than IE.

7. Dong chim or, as we call it in the US, rape

Dong chim (translation: poop needle) is a children's prank where the pranker sneaks up on the victim, puts their hands in the shape of a gun, and then tries to quickly insert their fingers into the victim's anus.

As a foreigner, it's really difficult to see this as anything other than sexual molestation. Then again, when I was in middle school, I hardly went an entire school day without seeing a fellow male student get slapped in the testicles.


8. The ubiquity of rock-paper-scissors

Koreans play rock-paper-scissors for EVERYTHING. To determine the order for games, to decide who has to do a chore, and even to decide who has to pick up the bill at a restaurant.

9. They put corn on their pizza and it's effin delicious.

That is all.


10. The plastic surgery obsession

See my post You So Handsome. Korea is the plastic surgery capital of the world. Nearly half of all women living in Seoul have had at least one operation. They're not alone though; men have started getting in on the action as well.

11. What's your blood type?

Koreans treat blood type much like (some) Americans treat astrological signs. They believe that it determines your personality and can determine the compatibility of two people. When I was asked what my blood type was by my coteachers, they were puzzled when I told them that I wasn't really sure. They then all agreed that I was definitely type AB.

My ex-girlfriends would probably agree.

12. Koreans brush their teeth like 8 times per day

Wake up, brush. Eat breakfast, brush. Have a cup of coffee, brush. Eat lunch, brush. Smell a fart, brush. Another cup of coffee, brush. Dinner, brush. Kiss your spouse, brush. The toothpaste industry must be making a killing.

13. Wandering hospital patients

Korean hospitals encourage the patients to get out of the hospital and wander around for a little while each day. It's common to see people in hospital gowns wandering down the street, sitting on a park bench, or even eating some fast food.

Thing is, this is kind of brilliant. There's actually been a lot of evidence in the past couple of years showing that hospital patients recover more quickly when they're allowed to go outside, look out a window, or even just look at a nature painting in their room.


14. Fan death

There's an urban legend in Korea that if you sleep in a closed room with a fan blowing, you will die. As far as I can tell, this is believed by a healthy majority of Koreans. People have different theories as to how it happens, but most believe that it somehow causes the person to asphyxiate. In 1972, there was a newspaper article in a Korean newspaper stating that a healthy man had suddenly died while a fan was left running in his room. The public then made the extraordinary leap that the fan was the cause of the death. In a classic case of confirmation bias, every sudden death thereafter of a person with a fan in the room came to be attributed to fan death. Interestingly, and depressingly, one of the reasons for the sustained belief in fan death is that Korea is the suicide capital of the world, but parents are too ashamed to tell their friends that their child committed suicide, so they blame it on fan death.

15. English t-shirts that are either inappropriate or don't make sense

Because of our movies and music, English has become associated with being cool. And because the education system here focuses so strongly on English, it has also become associated with being intelligent. This gives English the rare designation of being smart and cool at the same time and, as a result, has made English t-shirts extremely popular. The problem is that most people don't actually know or care what the words say, they just want a shirt with English on it.